Top 10 #Mumwins (okay 'win' may be abit of a stretch) of the week!

I have decided to do something a bit different, and update you all on what has been happening with us all this week. Hopefully, you get an insight that although I was a NICU Mum, I am also a Mum to a toddler as well. We are currently experiencing all things TODDLERDOM with my little Damien (666) seriously the older he gets the more worried I am he is the Omen! 
Here is the little bugger covered in Oreos shutting me out of the house and making me knock on the door to come in!
It also is nice to show you all how far away our life is from the time he was in hospital. We are fast approaching his year anniversary post op which is mind blowing. At times its so nice just to be a Mum to a normal little boy, and talk to other parents (many of you on Instagram) and laugh about all things #parentlife.

So here are my Top 10 Mum Wins (more like fails) that have been achieved this week.
1. We thought we got away with it, we got cocky thinking, 'Oh we won't get this'. We were wrong in the worst possible way, we succumbed to the SICK BUG!! (There is always one going about somewhere, someone always has a horror story).
Well I think it was a sick bug but as me and Greg were the only ones who were ill, so I am not sure it was. It may have however been a dodgy chicken takeaway we had the night before. (After telling my colleague that I have never gotten ill there). I sure bloody have now. It was most certainly a #Mumwin still looking after Elijah (well C Beebies did but I did have to turn the TV on in the first place) with me and Greg feeling like utter shite and having puked an entire chicken fillet burger meal continuously for quite some time. Bless him he ate leftover Easter Eggs and watched C Beebies from dawn until dusk. I have to say I still fancy Andy from Dinosaur Adventures after watching it 4 times that day.
The face of a mum who's been sick all day
2. We got lice. Yep, FISH LICE!!! Our goldfish got fish lice! (As if that's even a thing... it is trust me my fish got nits). Now, we got Elijah some fish for Xmas thinking I was being a clever and smug Mum with giving him a educational 'sensory' present. I however have become a serial fish killer. We have managed to loose 5 fish since Xmas) they have all gone to the U Bend in the sky. I may have had a hand with accidentally poisoning a couple of them.... fish are bloody complicated. They need so much! Pumps, filters, chemicals.... My advice; they are not bloody worth it. Elijah waves at them and has looked at them a few times. He hasn't noticed there is now only one lonely little fish in the tank. I may have distracted him with a hamster instead... So much easier!! But Fish Lice WTF? #Mumwin achieving some weird shit to talk about in the office that's not baby related. I don't think I can face watching Finding Nemo anytime soon though.
RIP Hanz :(
3. Elijah has learnt some new words this week; BRA!! Pointing and shouting when I get dressed. Boobies!! Again pointing at them and shouting, or grabbing them so I think he may pull them off. Although he cant quite say it he does get panty liners from the bathroom and come and stick them on my foof. I suppose he knows where they go? That's a #mumwin right?!

4. I have successfully ignored the piles upon piles of washing (even though I ran out of knickers) I decided to be inventive and wear Greg's underpants to work!! Hahahaha; Washing you thought you could defeat me with no Kecks, think again!! #Mumwin

5. Learnt another Peppa Pig episode and book off my heart (enough said). Elijah can now say like a tiny French man Peeeeppppeee PIG! Oh yay. Which means when he begs for another reading of the same book for the 100th time when I am trying to take a sneaky nap, I don't even have to look at it! I do worry if this new material is taking up my brain what am I forgetting it it's place.... probably how to do washing and look after fish.
Peppeee Pig
6. Found a new hobby.. oh yes and not just that, its a joint hobby with my hubby to be!! Oh, as the busy parents of a toddler what could this be?! Watching (now bordering on addiction) Bad Girls from the very beginning. Yep, every night. Whilst eating left over Easter Eggs and Haribo. #parentwin (I think?!) nah we've just become old farts who may get diabetes soon.

7. Grew something so big on the end of my nose it would be used for medical science. Seriously, I am 26 as if having chronic acne for my teens wasn't bad enough. I don't think Greg has noticed so far though... I'll take that as a win! Especially as I am too lazy to even try and cover it up... or shave my legs for that matter. He put a ring on it he has to live with it!!
8. From the above you may not believe this one but... I think I became a MILF!! Some young quite attractive boy I will hasten to add let me through quite a tight path (not a euphemism) and cheekily flashed me a grin and a wink. That's right... this Mamma still has it!! I was on my own walking to get Elijah from Nursery after my secret lounging session of 3 hours watching TV, then cramming everything I had to do in the last hour. Now I'm still pretty happy about this but looking back it may have been for a variety of reasons. He did in fact let me through as he became alarmed at the state of my Mum bun (from said lounging) it looked like it was taking off from my head, saw my huge zit, potentially had chocolate on my face, was sporting some very festive socks which were indeed on show as my skinny jeans didn't quite cover them, noticed I was still quite green from the bug or he saw me trip up before we got to close proximity as was worried I may take him out. NAAAAHHHHHHHH I am so now a MILF!!!
9.Manage to continuously eat Easter Eggs every day since Easter. BOOM! #mumwin. Elijah doesn't even know I ate most of his! Mwah hahahaha.
Elijah's book of the week bloody 'PA' (MAKKA PAKKA)
10. Stay in my Pj's for 3/4 of this week. Only to get changed into fresh ones once i've had a bath. I wish it was acceptable to wear them all the time. It is however frowned upon especially in Tesco. Oh well at least I am saving on washing #efficient mothering there.

Well that's about it really... for those who haven't already check out my new Selfish Mother Post. Have a nice relaxing weekend... Oh wait you have kids? Well that's never going to bloody happen. GOOD LUCK!
Not the best pic here as wiggly toddler would not stay still!


  1. I loved this Vicki. A very funny read! Thank you x

    1. Ahhh thank you Fiona! Glad it made you chuckle!! Xx

  2. Replies
    1. Thank you 😊 glad you enjoyed it!!


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