It seems Elijah is going through a bit of a 'phase'. Now, normally I think most people can say their child is going through a phase, when they are either being a little shit or they don't actually know why they are behaving the way they are. It's quite an old fashioned phrase and I tend to use it as an excuse if Elijah is being (delete where appropriate) grumpy/ tantruming/ fussy/ grizzly/clingy/ hyper. When said 'phase' is then mentioned most people will then nod in agreement sympathetically.He doesn’t like me and Greg touching, kissing, cuddling basically any physically contact at the moment. He has in theory has become a human durex. However, I have just read an article about how healthy it is for kids to see their parents kissing! Hmmm nothing is more of a turn on then a screaming toddler trying to force you both apart with his razor like little claws.
This phase seems a bit of an odd one. He is slightly obsessed with Greg. Bless him, it is cute he cries when Greg leaves for work and waves at him at the window but he has begun naming toys, characters and objects 'Daddy'. This includes so far;
Prince Eric from The Little Mermaid - during a bedtime story we got in a slight argument that this was Price Eric and not daddy.
Lego Duplo Farmer. Complete with overalls and hat.
Lego Duplo Bus driver
Ryder from Paw Patrol (I get this the hair is pretty similar).
A random man in MacDonald’s- Greg was even there with us!
Some poor unsuspecting parent at nursery.He spends most of the day saying 'daddy gone'. It is quite heart breaking to see him look for Greg but after 9 hours of saying this and that 'mummy is home' is does tend to get tedious. I don't think he has started naming things mummy and I barely get a cuddle when I go out the door! Talk about favouritism. I feel slightly dejected. I mean after 8 hours of labour and pushing him out of my foof, which might I add he didn't exactly leave in the best condition you would think he would he would know where his loyalty lies. Either that or it’s because I have seen Greg give him Jaffa Cakes for breakfast (that's right Mr... BUSTED.)
I do really love the fact he has this relationship with Greg. I myself did not have my dad around so I always wanted them to have a close bond. I also know that kids go through different phases (there it is again) of what parent they tend to prefer. At times I spend too much time wishing Greg was at home to give me a hand or help put him to bed that when he is there and Elijah does want to play or sit on him I can now and again get jealous.
Especially on a Tuesday as I am at work and the boys have the whole day together I get in and have misplaced my invite to the boys’ club. I feel I am very lucky to have a partner who is so heavily involved in his son's life he gets up early with him in the morning to let me sleep in, he changes his fair share of nappies etc and all in all we are pretty equal in the old parenting tasks.
However, I wonder why it is that I do get jealous. That I want him to be cuddling me and calling things mummy. Knowing my luck it would be effing Mummy Pig. I think I am sort of wanting my cake and eating it as well. A lot of cake is eaten in this household! I want a break, I want to work, I want to be Elijah's world. I wonder if we are just wanting it all now a days?
As a modern mother (my lord that made me cringe as a wrote that) I wonder if we are expecting too much. I think I am, I want Greg to pull his weight, I want to be considered equal in the fact I also work albeit not as many hours as him. I also study and blog and would like credit that I have done all of the washing, housework and cleaned up Peppa Pig raisins for the 50th time. Greg does this too, but I don't think I give him any credit. I mean the other day he completely reorganised the playroom and I barely said a word.
I realise that I feel hard done by at times when actually I have it pretty good. I get a lay in most mornings, Greg puts Elijah to bed at least 2-3 times a week. He pays all of the bills, and provides for us what he can. He encourages me to study, blog and to go out. I think at times I can be a bit of a selfish cow to him, so my wonderful hairy love this is me publicly recognising what you do for us. I think it has made me alter my expectations and the fact I need to stop wanting so much. However, I feel that modern day life and social media etc have given me these expectations.
Most are not this fortunate, my Nan for example raised two kids on her own whilst holding down a job and my Grandad being away at least 6 days a week. I bet her generation would think we have it made. Most dads are now taking on an equal amount of parenting where once it would be a woman's job. They can take shared paternity leave and many men are choosing this option now. Women are becoming more dominating in certain professions and most are not held back by traditional gender roles anymore. As parents we are now encouraged to go for it, to strive for what we want to achieve and not let the small thing of being a parent get in the way. We may moan, we may bitch but really I think we should consider ourselves quite lucky.
So really I need to take stock and maybe stop moaning, and start appreciating (maybe by shaving my legs more than once a week :)) my very own daddy cool. Oh lord this post has taken a rather sickly sweet turn.... On another note I have just learnt to not to give a hamster a blueberry as she now has the shits. Bloody hell.... 'GREEEEEGGGGGG'.