Vicki Cockerill - NICU MUM Blog

Harlow July 2017 I was invited to be interviewed by the Huffington Post UK for their amazing new #BirthDiaries series. It is a series that aims to share and bring together different birth experiences and stories. If you have followed me for a while you will know my youngest son's birth was a whirlwind unplanned 50 minute home birth after some fajitas  for tea! You can read my full birth story here . I believe it is so important to share our diverse birth stories to show the difference between them and how much they can vary. There is no perfect birth. This is also why I am a supporter of the amazing Make Birth Better Network , and have recently taken part in there #EveryWordCounts campaign. My advice of you are a parent to be about to give birth and a snippet from the interview... "Don’t fixate on what you’ve seen in the media and what your image of birth is. The chances are, it’s not going to go that way. We are given an unrealistic image of what a good b...

I don't know what's right and what's real anymore I don't know how I'm meant to feel anymore When do you think it will all become clear 'Cause I'm being taken over by the fear We are one week off going into the third trimester with baby number two, and it is official the fear is now returning. I find when you’re pregnant the fear ebbs and flows through the 9 months. When you first find out you are pregnant, you are just aiming to get through those first 12 weeks, the fear is ever present on your mind. Every cramp, twinge and symptom is scrutinized and the worry of miscarriage is rife. Until you see the baby on your scan, you cannot relax that something may be wrong. The scan gives you some reassurance then after a few more weeks the fear dissolves slowly as you enter the second trimester. Then something magical happens and as it the baby knows you are worried they begin to signal to you all is well or in my case, kick the crap out of my insides but...

To you... The mum, dad or family member currently sitting in the NICU ward by your baby’s side wishing them to be home for Christmas. They had a good week last week, things were looking up, surely just one more week and you would all be home? Celebrati ng your first Christmas with your NICU graduate, getting to grips with your new baby whilst making your festive lunch and opening presents, breathing a sigh of relief that you were now finally home. As a family, you were in the place where you all belonged, it wasn't meant to be though was it? There have now been a few setbacks, the test results didn't come back as they should and further action is needed over the next week. The next week, which is Christmas. The stark reality is that you will be in NICU over Christmas. No amount of knitted Santa hats, tinsel on the display boards or the mock turkey dinner in the canteen will ever make it feel like a real Christmas. You feel sick just...

Vote for me! My blog started 9 months ago now, and is considered my baby. It took 9 months of growing and it developed into something so much more than I ever imagined. It has led me to connect and meet some amazing people. I started the blog as a way of processing what I was feeling when I was suffering from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder after the birth of Elijah. I wanted to tell my story, as if writing it down would somehow make it better, that it may help others and it did. It gave me a channel to focus everything that I was feeling and thinking and to get it out. I didn’t expect much to come of the blog when I first set it up, I didn’t even set it up one of our friends did and I had no clue what I was doing! Then it became an addiction, I had to write and write and write, the more I did the more I felt like myself again. It was if I was becoming a better version of the person I was before as I was stronger, I had a focus and a purpose to help others who were going through t...

Today, November the 17 th sees the world celebrate all the premature babies and their families. To raise awareness for premature births and to highlight the issues that they face. 1 in 10 babies will be born premature that is 15 million babies each year. Today, may also be the time some children learn what it means that they were premature and the journey they and their family took. It can always be hard to breach the subject with a child, to explain that they faced a tougher start to life than most. That they were poorly, they needed extra care and stayed in hospital. They had to fight, to stay here, to be where they are today. The world stands up today and celebrates all the babies who were born early, and their families. Today, is for the mums, dads, grannies, aunties, uncle’s, cousins and friends which watched their little one small, vulnerable and fragile flight for their lives. It is to recognise the issues they face, and how we can improve the NICU experience for all. It ...

I bring you yet another #mamaissue that's right two in one week and it isn't even Christmas yet! This amazing post is written by the lovely Anna who I actually know! We live in the same town! She is now starting out her blogging career but I know it will be a successful one if this post is anything to go by! Stay tuned for later in the series when Anna features again! I think by the end of this post you will evaluate if you are really raising a sexist child. We all know that our children are impressionable and we may  think  that we are watching what we say around them (most of us don’t drop the “C” bomb right?!) but what about the things that we are subconsciously saying? The throwaway comments that are planting teeny tiny seeds in teeny tiny minds. Here are 8 things that many of us have or do say and the implications that they could have down the line: 1.”Because I am a girl….” To explain something to your child using the term “because I am a girl” just shouldn’t b...

After kicking of my #mamaissue series, the response I have received from all of you has been amazing. I have enjoyed reading each and every one of your #mamaissues after all if it is an issue for you, then it has a right of place in this series. It seems very fitting and I am sure you will agree to kick of the guest posts with a fellow NICU MUM Ashton Conway from Our Preemie Family . Here are her very honest and real (two for one) NICU #mamaissues. ASKING PERMISSION TO BE A MOM August 18th, 2014 The one thing I never thought of when my husband and I decided to have kids was asking permission to do the most basic parenting things. And with your first child in the NICU you have to ask to do the most basic of parenting tasks. I had to wait until my son was 25 days old before I could even change his diaper. Changing a diaper is a task most other parents bicker and try and pass off to the other or a visiting grandparent and its something I had to wait 25 days to do. That's about...

I don’t think many of you will be surprised with my #mamaissue that I have chosen to kick of the series with. It is something I have both touched upon and gone into great detail about before on the blog. My #mamaissue is the lack of mental health support on offer for NICU parents in the UK. First of all, I know this will not be the case for all, and some will have received the support and care that all of us deserve. Why is it a postcode lottery in this country that determines the care that you receive when you baby is admitted to NICU? In this day and age surely we are all entitled to receive the same treatment? At the time I have to say I feel punished with the lack of treatment and support I had because of the area I was from. This should not be the case, and on a brighter note a friend had a baby in NICU in the same hospital and received some amazing support from a Bliss Nurse. She believes this may have been down to the fact that she was on her own, or that she was in there...