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The birth of a blog... and an award nomination.

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When we were told E had #chd I felt so alone. I knew no one else who had gone though what we were and when I looked online I couldn't find anyone writing about it other than on forums.
I was angry, bitter and resentful, where were all the parenting blogs telling you honestly how shit it is to have a child who is ill?
Who needs surgery?
I began my blog to fill that gap, if I could help just one other person feel less alone, semi normal or just to raise awareness then it was worth it.
The minute I connected with others who had gone through the same thing I felt understood.
I connected with those that hadn't gone through what we had but who supported and empowered me.
I don't have thousands of followers, I don't get asked to events or #gifted things.
I am as far aways from being one of the cool kids as they come.
But, I am honest.
I am confessing what life is really like with a heart baby, and what parenting is really like with mental health struggles.
I am not about to …

The Backstory Podcast

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Everyone who knows me is aware that I don't really like publicly speaking. I also have a cracking Norfolk accent I am a tad self conscious off but alas I digress.

I can never get my words out in the way I want them too (hence why I am a writer) despite my nerves I have recorded a #podcast with the brilliant @thebackstorypodcast

I talk about our #nicu story and life as a #nicuparent and our #journey.

You can listen to it and the other brilliant podcasts here;

https://itunes.apple.com/gb/podcast/who-helps-nicu-parents-vickis-story/id1273831166?i=1000416466765&mt=2

I want to tell our story in as many ways as I can, to as many people in hope that it helps just one person feel less alone, to comfort them and to raise awareness of the issues that need to change.


#podcasts #backstory #nicu #chd #mother #parent #blogger #mystory #norwich #norfolk #recording #nicumum #honestconfessions #parentlife #norwichblogger #norfolkblogger #mums #dads

To my second son on your first birthday...

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To my darling boy,
You seem so large in my arms all of a sudden or perhaps it's because I am taking notice of how much you've changed.
From your less than traditional entrance in the world you were always going to do it differently weren't you?
You are already , walking, talking and climbing on anything you can get your hands and feet on.
You seem so old, yet are still so young.
You race around to keep up with your brother.
You play with and do whatever he does, perhaps that's why you seem so grown up.
I see how you look at him, with complete love and devotion.
I am writing to say two things.
One, Happy 1st Birthday my long haired loony. I hope you enjoy being spoilt beyond belief. Something your not too used too hay?
The other is to say I am sorry.
After you were born I wasn't myself for a very long time and somewhere along the line I blamed you.
I blamed you for how I was feeling, for the darkness and that wasn't fair.
I couldn't control the darkness and…

#MakeBirthBetter

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I have given birth twice now, and have two very different stories I could tell you.

As a society we seem to love a good birth story.

I remember people messaging me just after H was born via social media and the blog desperate for me to publish our birth story.

I have friends who were induced, who were in labour for minutes, hours and even days.

I know those who had C ections, VBACS, vaginal births and everything in between. There is no denying it we love a birth story.

But here is what I've learnt, we don't necessarily tell the truth especially if we had a bad or traumatic birth.

We glaze over it, we say it was fine and it's okay because we got our little bundle of non sleeping joy at the end of it.

We trick ourselves into thinking people have had it worse than us, that we are making a fuss.

It's okay because we got through it despite how horrendous it really was and now we do what we do best we bury it, paper over the cracks and move on.

Or do we?

There is still so m…

Hope

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-Hope-

To you, sitting there watching your baby through an incubator window.

To you, fearing the worst after being dealt the devastating blow that your child is going to have this sentence around their neck for life.

To you, standing in the hospital corridor while your child is in surgery.

To you, crying yourself to sleep because you think your child will be taken from you.

To you, sitting in recovery looking down at your child wondering if they will ever be the same again.

To you, terrified that they will never meet their milestones.

Dear Kelly Brook...

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Dear Kelly Brook,
I would like to drop a quick note to you about those comments that you made about mothers being unprofessional compared to their childless colleagues if they have childcare issues.

I'll share the day I had yesterday with you. I am a freelance writer having left my office job last year. Sounds like a walk in the park working from home around two small kids?
It's not.

I know how in demand writing gigs are and I have to go up against a number of writers with no children and thus more managable time.

I had my 11 month old baby yet I juggled 3 deadlines and even chose to take on some urgent quick turn around work that afternoon too, three loads of washing and then worked up until the kids bedtime. 

I know I have to put in more effort, work harder and be more reliable all because I am a mother. I still took time out to play, put him down for a nap and dropped my other son off at nursery. I presume this makes me unprofessional working with my childcare issue?!

I st…

The time I let my three-year-old takeover my Instagram.

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I often wondered what Elijah must think I do when he sees me on my phone, or on the laptop when we label it as ‘Mummy is working’.
He has had his fair share of requests from me to pose for my Instagram or blog and I had this idea a while back about him taking over my grid.
I wanted to see things from his point of view via his eyes.
He would choose what he wanted to post and take the photos himself, I would upload and for one-week Elijah would takeover.
Slightly worried I would have no followers left after a week of photos of his SuperZing collection never the less we decided on a week he would takeover.
Beforehand I spoke to Elijah about how I choose to share photos, who can see them, and showing him my grid, he had already come up with a few posts he wanted to do. Including a photo of him on the toilet which was quickly vetoed.
I was really interested to see what was important enough to Elijah for him to share, and what he would glean from this or already knew about how social media worke…