Vicki Cockerill - NICU MUM Blog

For those that follow me on social media will see that this week, I was faced with some criticism for a post I had written. The post was featured on The Mighty a few months ago, and has been shared via some heart/ CHD sites too. The post which you can read here: ( https://themighty.com/2016/12/congenital-heart-defect-people-asking-if-child-is-fixed/ )   was written about when someone asked a simple question about Elijah. Is he fixed? I politely answered, but in hindsight something was bothering me. It was the terminology. It was the realisation that no, my son will never be fixed. So, I did what I do with most things, I wrote to process how I was feeling at the time. It was not a discussion, it was not instruction to all other heart parents on how they should act when someone asks a question. I didn't demand a revolution that we all protest when someone dares ask us a question. It was a post about a mum who was struggling to come to terms with the reality of her son's conditio...

Dear Public, This is a letter just to explain a few things, I would say it is something of a public apology but I will let you into a secret…. I am not sorry. I am not sorry I chose to have a child, nor do I regret this even on a bad day. I am not sorry my child is strong willed, has likes and dislikes and is his own person. He is a little boy who expresses emotion, just like any adult. He may not understand his emotion at the time, and this will frustrate him and he will act out. I am not sorry when you are looking disapprovingly in the supermarket when he is crying as I will not buy him sweets. That I am taking my time going down to his level to explain how he is feeling. I am sorry I choose to comfort my son, I am not sorry I didn’t leave or take him outside through embarrassment. What have I got to be embarrassed about? Kicking back on the train, cue the scolding. I am sorry that he will scream, cry and kick when he goes back in the pushchair. He wants ...