Dear Public,
This is a letter just to explain a few things, I would say
it is something of a public apology but I will let you into a secret…. I am not
sorry.
I am not sorry I chose to have a child, nor do I regret this
even on a bad day.
I am not sorry my child is strong willed, has likes and
dislikes and is his own person.
He is a little boy who expresses emotion, just like any
adult. He may not understand his emotion at the time, and this will frustrate him
and he will act out.
I am not sorry when you are looking disapprovingly in the
supermarket when he is crying as I will not buy him sweets. That I am taking my
time going down to his level to explain how he is feeling.
I am sorry I choose to comfort my son, I am not sorry I didn’t
leave or take him outside through embarrassment.
What have I got to be embarrassed about?
 |
| Kicking back on the train, cue the scolding. |
I am sorry that he will scream, cry and kick when he goes
back in the pushchair. He wants to explore, learn and experience new things,
but at times I need to do this to ensure his safety he does not understand this yet.
I am not sorry that in a restaurant he may get up and wander
around, or scream too loudly and that he is maybe ‘unruly’.
I am sorry you felt we were not good enough to sit next to
even though we too were paying customers JUST LIKE YOU.
I am his mother and not Professor X, and I do not control him.
He is his own person, no matter how much I will guide and teach him, he will still do what the hell he likes. Even when I bribe him with mini bags of Haribo.
Do you know while you are judging me as a parent that I am raising
a kind, gentle and funny little boy who loves to share? That he had a horrendously
difficult start to his life.
That I am trying to teach him to be kind, open and accepting
of others so when he grows up he doesn’t judge others like you.
I am sorry I do not choose to keep him prisoner in him own
home, and god forbid take him out in PUBLIC.
I am sorry you had the misfortune to come across my child
who at the time, was tired and was not too impressed he was on the bus in the
heat and stuck in a traffic jam. I am sorry you felt you couldn’t talk to me like an
adult, a decided to make a scene and move away from us on the bus tutting.
Do you know how that made me feel? Are you a parent?
 |
| ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME? |
I am sorry my 2-year-old toddler hasn’t figured out all the
manners and etiquette; that he does not know what is socially expected of him
at his age. I mean 2 whole years and he is learning. SHOCK HORROR.
When you see a toddler or child having a tantrum why do you
look at the parents like they are worthy of a social services call? It’s not
their fault! They are not on the floor screaming, are they?
Why do you feel it is okay to make rude comments, judge someone’s
parenting ability on that singular moment? The look of disgust on your face
that you have had to endure this in your day, horrifies me.
Do you know their story? The day they have had? Their
circumstance? NO.
Do you remember being a child? Don’t you think you did this
at their age too?
Maybe you are a parent, or a grandparent, can you not remember
the terrible twos? The tantrums?
Why are we as parents being made to feel like we are the
worst humans on the planet if our child acts out in public?
 |
| The face of angel |
Please think of the parent, do you think we want to be standing
in Poundland having an argument with a child who is flat down refusing to let
go of the plastic police helmet and gun?
So public, this is my non apology letter to say I cannot
control my child, just as I cannot control you. I don’t care he is a child and he
is learning.
When my child is acting out in public I will never apologise,
we shouldn’t have too.
From,
A mama who no longer gives a crap what you the public thinks.
P.S This is dedicated to Kate Raine, the mother who found
herself criticized and publicly humiliated online by the café she took her
child too. Mama, you’re doing amazing this is for you.
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