Skip to main content

Dear Ant...

Dear Ant and Dec (Ant),

I know I am a bit behind but I have been struggling with the words to express how I feel about what happened last week.

Your "public" breakdown.

You see, I grew up watching you on SMTV, I have been hungover eating takeaway watching you on Prime Time Weekend TV for most of my adult life.

I too have struggled, with self sabotage, with abusing medication and making reckless and irresponsible decisions.

Some as a shout out for someone, anyone to notice me. To see my pain, some because I felt compelled to do so.

I don't condone what you did, but I can understand how you got there.

I too, have suffered with mental illness for all my life. I cannot imagine how it feels to go through it in the public eye.

When all you want to do is hide away and try and make some sort of sense to what is happening to you.

When the only trip put you make all week is to the Doctors.

When you don't trust yourself with your own prescription.

When you feel like you might never be happy again.

I saw some viral posts comparing you to Robin Williams how we never know what's going on behind the smile.

I think this is wrong.

We shouldn't compare one person's mental health with another.

Everyone is different, we shouldn't tar everyone with the same "depression" brush.

Depression and mental health have different faces and it isn't a one size fits all.

All I can say to you is that do what YOU need to do. If you need to, shut yourself away and focus on you.

You do deserve it.
You aren't being selfish or self pitying.

Those that care will still be there, but they can't fix this for you. Only you can.

One day you will look back and know that you beat this.

Take care of yourself.

From someone who gets it x

.
.
.
.
#mentalhealth
#depression
#doesntdiscriminate
#antanddec
#nicumum
#honestconfessions
#parentlife

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The one with Elijah's heart surgery.

We were back. April 22-28 2015, a year ago this weekend. In just two short weeks since we last went down to London. We had to go down the day before and check in and have another blood test. As all of the forms had been signed last time, we were out again within an hour or so. Back to the same family accommodation, in a different room and with a lot less luggage. Something felt different this time, although I didn't want to believe it was going ahead in the event it was cancelled again, deep down I knew it would be. The morning of the surgery I knew how I would feel as we had been through this all before. I didn't want to go out for a meal so we ate in the hotel room watching ch5 rubbish after Elijah went down in the travel cot. Its odd that through the whole pre admission, cancelled op and the actual operation I can remember what shit we watched on TV and what we ate for tea that night. One of those weird things that just sticks in your head. Sort of like when you remem...
5 comments
Read more

The time Fajita night resulted in having a baby in a bath.

The newest Cockerill Do you all remember my ever so optimistic natural birth plan? You can read it here. However, spoiler alert, it didn’t happen. What did happen was something no one was expecting. Wednesday the 5 th July… a mundane sort of day spent cleaning the house and doing the weekly shop. With Greg going back to work the next day I was determined to make sure everything was ready for when this baby arrived! I was three days off my due date and still hadn’t had one single sign this baby was imminently coming. I had been receiving messages from quite a few people asking if baby was here yet. I was getting fed up as everything I had tried to induce labour failed miserably and every morning for the last two weeks I woke up disappointed I wasn’t in labour! I gave up, walking didn’t help, pineapple made me sick and I was beginning to tire of the raspberry leaf tea. This baby was staying put. In the evening I put Elijah bed, and we began to settle down for the eveni...
7 comments
Read more

Helping Harper.

Harper One of the most memorable milestones is when your child takes their 1st steps. When we were told E had suffered a stroke at birth we didn't know if he would learn to walk. But he did and it is a memory that we can recall down to the last detail. But what if you knew your child wouldn't take their first steps but there was a chance that they could. You needed £80,000 wouldn't you do everything you can do make it happen? This is little Harper and I am sharing her story in hope that it might help getting this little one to America for surgery not available here so she can take her first 👣 "Just4Children hoping to raise enough for Harper to have SDR surgery in America, a spinal surgery not available on the NHS that could change her life allowing her to walk unaided. 'Our Harper is 18 months old from Norwich. On our second visit in a week to the hospital due to lack of movement, Harper was born via emergency C-section where she was found to have a r...
Post a Comment
Read more